A simple lesson in life that we miss

A simple lesson in life that we miss

A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor.

Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life.

Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to hot coffee.

When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the professor said : "If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is but normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the best cups and were eyeing each other's cups.

Now if life is coffee, then the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain Life, but the quality of Life doesn't change. Some times, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee in it."

So Don't let the cups drive you... Enjoy the coffee instead!!!


"The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything."

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

Free Food

There was a village that was attacked by wild boars.

Everyday the wild boars would enter the village to rampage the whole village of their food. The villagers tried various means to fight and chase away the wild boars, but without much success.

One day a wise man approached the village headman to offer his advice. He told the villagers that they will have to follow all his advice and directions. Out of desperation, the villagers agreed. The wise man told the villagers to gather all the food from every household and put it in the middle of a big empty field. They followed his advice, and immediately they saw hundreds of wild boars approaching the vicinity where the food was placed. The wild boars were apprehensive initially, but after a while they went for the food. Once the wild boars had a taste of the food they came back for the free food everyday. And everyday the villagers would put more food in the field and the wild boars would come to have their free meals. After a while, the wise man asked the villagers to erect four poles at the four-corners of the field.

The wild boars were too busy having their food that they did not take notice of what was happening. After a few weeks, the wild boars developed the habit of having free food. The wise man then asked the villagers to put fencing around the field, with a large gate through which the wild boars can enter to have their food. Finally once the fencing and the gate were completed the villagers closed the gate and all the wild boars were trapped inside the field. The wild boars were finally defeated!

SUCCESS PRINCIPLES

Habits are easily developed but difficult to get rid of. The wild boars were trapped because out of their greed, they developed the habit of having free food, and without having to work for their food. They became so comfortable, that they did not realize they were being trapped. Most of us are like the wild boars because we become too comfortable with our jobs and businesses that we do not realize we are in one way or another being "trapped". We seek security rather than freedom!

HOW POOR WE ARE?

Please forward this mail to all of your friends

One day, the father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the express purpose of showing him how poor people live.

They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family.

On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, 'How was the trip?'

'It was great, Dad.'

'Did you see how poor people live?' the father asked.

'Oh yeah,' said the son.
'So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip?' asked the father

The son answered:

'I saw that we have one dog and they had four.

We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end.

We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night.

Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon.

We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight.

We have servants who serve us, but they serve others.

We buy our food, but they grow theirs.

We have walls around our property to protect us, they have friends to protect them.'

The boy's father was speechless.

Then his son added, 'Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are.'

Isn't perspective a wonderful thing?

Makes you wonder what would happen if we all gave thanks for everything we have, instead of worrying about what we don't have.

Appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends!

'Life is too short and friends are too few.'

Live Humbly, There Are Great People Around Us, Let Us Learn

Vivek Pradhan was not a happy man. Even the plush comfort of the air-conditioned compartment of the Shatabdi express could not cool his frayed nerves. 

 

He was the Project Manager and still not entitled to air travel. It was not the prestige he sought, he had tried to reason with the admin person, it was the savings in time. As PM, he had so many things to do. He opened his case and took out the laptop, determined to put the time to some good use. 

 

Are you from the software industry sir," the man beside him was staring appreciatively at the laptop. Vivek glanced briefly and mumbled in affirmation, handling the laptop now with exaggerated care and importance as if it were an expensive car. 

 

"You people have brought so much advancement to the country sir. Today everything is getting computerized. " 

 

"Thanks," smiled Vivek, turning around to give the man a look. He always found it difficult to resist appreciation. 

 

The man was young and stocky like a sportsman. He looked simple and strangely out of place in that little lap of luxury like a small town boy in a prep school. He probably was a railway sportsman making the most of his free traveling pass. 

 

"You people always amaze me," the man continued, "You sit in an office and write something on a computer and it does so many big things outside." Vivek smiled deprecatingly. Naivety demanded reasoning not anger. 

 

"It is not as simple as that my friend. It is not just a question of writing a few lines. There is a lot of process that goes behind it." For a moment, he was tempted to explain the entire Software Development Life cycle but restrained himself to a single statement. 

 

"It is complex, very complex." 

 

"It has to be. No wonder you people are so highly paid," came the reply. 

 

This was not turning out as Vivek had thought. A hint of belligerence came into his so far affable, persuasive tone. 

 

"Everyone just sees the money. No one sees the amount of hard work we have to put in. Indians have such a narrow concept of hard work. 

 

Just because we sit in an air-conditioned office does not mean our brows do not sweat. You exercise the muscle; we exercise the mind and believe me that is no less taxing." 

 

He had the man where he wanted him and it was time to drive home the point. "Let me give you an example. Take this train. The entire railway reservation system is computerized. You can book a train ticket between any two stations from any of the hundreds of computerized booking centers across the country. 

 

Thousands of transactions accessing a single database, at a time concurrency; data integrity, locking, data security. 

 

Do you understand the complexity in designing and coding such a system?" The man was stuck with amazement, like a child at a planetarium. 

 

This was something big and beyond his imagination. 

 

"You design and code such things." 

 

"I used to," Vivek paused for effect, 

 

"But now I am the Project Manager," 

 

"Oh!" sighed the man, as if the storm had passed over, 

 

"so your life is easy now." It was like being told the fire was better than the frying pan. The man had to be given a feel of the heat. 

 

"Oh come on, does life ever get easy as you go up the ladder. Responsibility only brings more work. 

 

Design and coding! That is the easier part. Now I do not do it, but I am responsible for it and believe me, that is far more stressful. My job is to get the work done in time and with the highest quality. 

 

To tell you about the pressures, there is the customer at one end always changing his requirements, the user wanting something else and your boss always expecting you to have finished it yesterday." Vivek paused in his diatribe, his belligerence fading with self-realisation. 

 

What he had said, was not merely the outburst of a wronged man, it was the truth. And one need not get angry while defending the truth. 

 

"My friend," he concluded triumphantly, 

 

"you don't know what it is to be in the line of fire." The man sat back in his chair, his eyes closed as if in realization. When he spoke after sometime, it was with a calm certainty that surprised Vivek. 

 

"I know sir, I know what it is to be in the line of fire," He was staring blankly as if no passenger, no train existed, just a vast expanse of time. 

 

"There were 30 of us when we were ordered to capture Point 4875 in the cover of the night. The enemy was firing from the top. There was no knowing where the next bullet was going to come from and for whom. In the morning when we finally hoisted the tricolor at the top only 4 of us were alive." 

 

"You are a..." 

 

"I am Subedar Sushant from the 13 J&K Rifles on duty at Peak 4875 in Kargil. They tell me I have completed my term and can opt for a land assignment. But tell me sir, can one give up duty just because it makes life easier. 

 

On the dawn of that capture, one of my colleagues lay injured in the snow, open to enemy fire while we were hiding behind a bunker. It was my job to go and fetch that soldier to safety. But my captain refused me permission and went ahead himself. He said that the first pledge he had taken as a Gentleman Cadet was to put the safety and welfare of the nation foremost followed by the safety and welfare of the men he commanded. 

 

His own personal safety came last, always and every time. He was killed as he shielded that soldier into the bunker. Every morning now, as I stand guard I can see him taking all those bullets, which were actually meant for me. 

 

I know sir, I know what it is to be in the line of fire." 

 

Vivek looked at him in disbelief not sure of his reply. Abruptly he switched off the laptop. It seemed trivial, even insulting to edit a word document in the presence of a man for whom valour and duty was a daily part of life; a valour and sense of duty which he had so far attributed only to epical heroes. 

 

The train slowed down as it pulled into the station and Subedar Sushant picked up his bags to alight. "It was nice meeting you sir." Vivek fumbled with the handshake. This hand had climbed mountains, pressed the trigger, and hoisted the Tri-colour. Suddenly as if by impulse, he stood at attention and his right hand went up in an impromptu salute. It was the least he felt he could do for the country. 

 

PS: The incident he narrates during the capture of Peak 4875 is a true-life incident during the Kargil war. Capt. Batra sacrificed his life while trying to save one of the men he commanded, as victory was within sight. For this and his various other acts of bravery he was awarded the Param Vir Chakra the nation's highest military award. Live humbly, there are great people around us, let us learn!

We Are the Problem Not Others

A man feared his wife wasn't hearing as well as she used to and he thought she might need a hearing aid. 

 

Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family doctor to discuss the problem. The Doctor told him there is a simple informal test the husband could perform to give the Doctor a better idea about her hearing loss. 

 

Here's what you do," said the Doctor, "stand about 40 feet away from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response. 

 

"That evening, the wife is in the kitchen cooking dinner, and he was in the den. He says to himself, "I'm about 40 feet away, let's see what happens." then in a normal tone he asks, 'Honey, what's for dinner?" 

 

No response. So the husband moves to closer to the kitchen, about 30 feet from his wife and repeats, "Honey, what's for dinner?" 

 

Still no response. Next he moves into the dining room where he is about 20 feet from his wife and asks, Honey, what's for dinner?" 

 

Again he gets no response, so he walks up to the kitchen door, about 10 feet away. "Honey, what's for dinner?" 

 

Again there is no response. So he walks right up behind her. "Honey, what's for dinner?"  

 

"James, for the FIFTH time I've said, CHICKEN!" 

 

Moral of the story: The problem may not be with the other one as we always think, could be very much within us!

Gandhism-a Must Read for Parents/Trainers

Dr. Arun Gandhi, grandson of Mahatma Gandhi and founder of the M.K.Gandhi Institute for Non-violence, in his lecture at the University of Puerto Rico , shared the following story: 

 

I was 16 years old and living with my parents at the institute my grandfather had founded 18 miles outside of Durban, South Africa, in the middle of the sugar plantations. 

 

We were deep in the country and had no neighbors, so my two sisters and I would always look forward to going to town to visit friends or go to the movies. 

 

One day, my father asked me to drive him to town for an all-day conference, and I jumped at the chance. Since I was going to town, my mother gave me a list of groceries she needed and, since I had all day in town, my father asked me to take care of several pending chores, such as getting the car serviced. 

 

When I dropped my father off that morning, he said, "I will meet you here at 5:00 p.m., and we will go home together." 

 

After hurriedly completing my chores, I went straight to the nearest movie theater. I got so engrossed in a John Wayne double-feature that I forgot the time. It was 5:30 before I remembered. By the time I ran to the garage and got the car and hurried to where my father was waiting for me, it was almost 6:00. 

 

He anxiously asked me, "Why were you late?" I was so ashamed of telling him I was watching a John Wayne western movie that I said, "The car wasn't ready, so I had to wait," not realizing that he had already called the garage. 

 

When he caught me in the lie, he said: "There's something wrong in the way I brought you up that didn't give you the confidence to tell me the truth. In order to figure out where I went wrong with you, I'm going to walk home 18 miles and think about it." 

 

So, dressed in his suit and dress shoes, he began to walk home in the dark on mostly unpaved, unlit roads. I couldn't leave him, so for five-and-a-half hours I drove behind him, watching my father go through this agony for a stupid lie that I uttered. 

 

I decided then and there that I was never going to lie again. I often think about that episode and wonder, if he had punished me the way we punish our children, whether I would have learned a lesson at all. I don't think so. 

 

I would have suffered the punishment and gone on doing the same thing. But this single non-violent action was so powerful that it is still as if it happened yesterday. That is the power of non-violence.

Why Do We Shout in Anger?

A saint asked his disciples, 'Why do we shout in anger? Why do people shout at each other when they are upset?' 

 

Disciples thought for a while, one of them said, 'Because we lose our calm, we shout for that.' 'But, why to shout when the other person is just next to you?' asked the saint. 'Isn't it possible to speak to him or her with a soft voice? 

 

Why do you shout at a person when you're angry?' Disciples gave some other answers but none satisfied the saint. 

 

Finally he explained, 'When two people are angry at each other, their hearts distance a lot. To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. 

 

The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other through that great distance.' 

 

Then the saint asked, 'What happens when two people fall in love? They don't shout at each other but talk softly, why? Because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is very small...' 

 

The saint continued, 'When they love each other even more, what happens? They do not speak, only whisper and they get even closer to each other in their love. 

 

Finally they even need not whisper, they only look at each other and that's all. That is how close two people are when they love each other.' 

 

MORAL: When you argue do not let your hearts get distant, do not say words that distance each other more, else there will come a day when the distance is so great that you will not find the path to return, not to shout.

Story on Anger